Today I have been busy running around and getting last minute things done since we leave on Thursday. Much like Carol, these past few days have been very hard. I am trying desperately to not let the tears come, because I am afraid that they might not stop. I am going to miss my amazing husband and family like I never have before, and have felt very selfish in this because I know at the end of it all, my husband and family will be here when I return. This was not true when the genocide ended and hundreds of thousands of people lost some if not all of their family. Going on this trip is a small sacrifice when you consider what happened in Rwanda 15 years ago.

This trip has become so incredibly important and so passionate in so many ways. Carol and I have met the most amazing strangers and re-aquainted ourselves with friends from long ago, and these are the people that have given a new face to humanity for me. In the midst when it seemed hopeless to each get five children sponsored, we have gone onto getting twenty three so far and we have 4 days left and two more children to go. With you, the sponsor, we never could have accomplished what we did and we thank you from the bottom of our hearts. You have renewed my faith and I can only hope that I will learn and grow as much as possible so that I can come back to Canada and help make a bigger difference in more childrens lives and continue to spread the word about how incredible World Vision is.

I want each of you to know that I am going to draw on your kindness and compassion as we travel around Rwanda and you will all be in my heart. It is amazing to me that sometimes in my darkest hours something happens to "remind" me of what is important in life and tonight I stumbled upon a verse written by Oriah Mountain Dreamer that was buried under a pile of paper. I thought it appropriate to share it with you. It reminds me of why this separation from loved ones at this time is so important. It reminds me that I have alot of growing to do. I have alot of living to do. This trip is what I "ache" for and I know it will help with meeting my heart's longing. I hope that you enjoy it and maybe reflect on what is important in your life.


The Invitation

It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for
and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.

It doesn’t interest me how old you are.
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool
for love
for your dream
for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon...
I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow
if you have been opened by life’s betrayals
or have become shrivelled and closed
from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain
mine or your own
without moving to hide it
or fade it
or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy
mine or your own
if you can dance with wildness
and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes
without cautioning us
to be careful
to be realistic
to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me
is true.
I want to know if you can
disappoint another
to be true to yourself.
If you can bear the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithless
and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty
even when it is not pretty
every day.
And if you can source your own life
from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure
yours and mine
and still stand at the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon,
“Yes.”

It doesn’t interest me
to know where you live or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up
after the night of grief and despair
weary and bruised to the bone
and do what needs to be done
to feed the children.

It doesn’t interest me who you know
or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand
in the centre of the fire
with me
and not shrink back.

It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom
you have studied.
I want to know what sustains you
from the inside
when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone
with yourself
and if you truly like the company you keep
in the empty moments.


Vickie